Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Perspective

It's funny reading comments on the last post. I started by saying that being back at work was killing me, but thinking about it made me realize it is Bud and I being back at work that is killing me. All three of my kids are born in May, which means that after a few weeks Bud has been home with me.

All summer I have read blogs of many awesome ladies who had also recently had a third baby (is three the new two kids?). I spent all that time wondering how the heck ya'll do it without your husband at home. How do you wrangle two older kids and tend a baby? I had it easy because Bud and I could switch off, one baby equals two older kids. Even during June when he was finishing his masters I could still run and shower and not wonder if the kids would burn the house down. If one kid kept me awake, I could sleep in and he could get up with the kids. Very few mothers have that luxury.

If I stayed home the schedule wouldn't change that much. I would take the two girls with me to drop Owen off at school, I would still need to get them ready to get out the door. Then we would probably head somewhere to run errands or something. Then home for lunch and naps. Then pick up Owen and the rest of the evening would be the same. I wouldn't need to pump, but we wouldn't be able to afford the cleaning lady. ( which I am kind of embarrassed about having, it seems snooty, and lazy and pathetic) So I would have to spend more of my time cleaning. Plus I am guessing Bud would not help as much.

Work is the easy part of my day. Teenagers are fun, I love my job. Financially, I have to have a job, I am lucky enough that I have one that is fun. It also gives me the opportunity to spend more time with my family than most other professions. I frequently wish I could stay home, but I don't know that I would do that great of a job. I am not good about doing "kid stuff". Bud is always the one to suggest going to a museum, or park(I'm not an outside girl), or a movie. When he stays home with a sick kid, the house is cleaner, dinner is done and the tv is off.

Anyway, I know we will find better systems to make things run more smoothly. I need to let go of my dinner expectations. I really hate take-out, so I attempt to cook full on meals everynight. I need to let Bud cook two nights a week and stop being a control freak. Soup and sandwiches is a perfectly acceptable mid-week dinner. Fried chicken and mashed potatoes with gravy, more of a weekend dinner.

3 comments:

melissa said...

It is all about perspective...isn't it? I am lucky too in that my husband works from home so as I have been feeling like I'm drowning at work this week, he was able to pick up Owen from school. Plus that whole SUMMERS OFF thing is just fabulous!

Mimi said...

You know, I think that it is just not that easy for anyone... working or not. With my husband working all day and being at home with three kids now, I'll tell you that there is a lot of stuff that just doesn't get done anymore. Non-essential things have to wait until the evenings or the weekends when he is home. And lots of things have become non-essential all of a sudden.
Three kids is def. a handful and I give you so much credit for being able to get them all ready in the morning and still be at work on time. I don't blame you one bit for having a cleaning lady... I think that would be a necessity for every working mom!

Joanne said...

I just started cooking dinners again and my 3rd is almost four months old! I agree, I think it's hard no matter what, especially when they're kind of close together. Sometimes I wish I had like a 15 year old or something to make babysit for a while. :)